Submission

                He was oppressed, and he was afflicted, yet he opened not his mouth; like a lamb that is led to the slaughter, and like a sheep that before its shearers is silent, so he opened not his mouth.

                Isaiah 53:7

 

I don’t have a perfect marriage, because it's made up of two imperfect people. It works, because we both make every attempt to be humble before each other (and God). We submit to one another.

                But wait, I don’t see anything in the Bible that says a man should submit to a woman, that’s preposterous! Inconceivable! What about Genesis 3; "and he shall rule over you"? The man is the lord of the house, and all that.

                Well, that is true. It does say that in Genesis 3. But lets look a little deeper into that. What is God saying to Adam and Eve in that section of Genesis? He is cursing them for their disobedience. He curses Eve with pain in childbirth (and child-rearing, in my opinion), and he also curses her with the desire to rule her husband. In turn, he curses the man with the curse that he will rule over the wife. So its not a command, it's not even a suggestion, it’s a curse. We are cursed with sinful desires; Jackie wants to be in charge, and so do I. It's part of our sinful nature.

                How do we deal with it? By being submissive to one another. It works, because we both do it. It works because that is how God intended it to work. But it all seems so backwards, doesn’t it? How can no-one be in charge? No one is in charge, because God is in charge.

                Dietrich Bonhoeffer said (I'm paraphrasing) that we only have one relationship as a Christian, and that is to Christ. All of our other relationships are mediated through Him. I don’t interact with my wife, I interact with my wife though Christ, because I am Christ and He is me.

                It also works because it was designed to work in another way. Back to Genesis, now.

                Then the Lord God said, “It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit               for him.” 2:18

Helper here means something more like ally or comrade, not like assistant. But the key word is 'fit for'. The Hebrew here means complimentary. My wife and I are two halves of a whole. I don’t pretend to know it all, and neither does she. We both submit to someone greater than ourselves.