Change

Memory is a strange thing.  As much as it is an abstract, philosophical concept, it is also in some ways an ethereal object that we can feel, touch, and experience. They are locked away in our minds, and many times, we also wear them on our sleeves and carry them in our pockets, or put them on our shelves, or hang them on our walls. We attach our memories to real, physical objects because that's how they feel to us. Somehow our memories aren't nothingness inside our mind, they are real and true and exist.

After being on vacation for a week, I came into work and emptied my pockets. A €2 coin with a harp embossed on the back came out with my keys. Although the day was no different than any other morning at work, I was instantly transported to where I had been only a day prior. But along with that feeling came a feeling of longing. A feeling of remembrance. I could hear the music and see the people and feel the cool air. I was ready to be home, but I was remembering how wonderful it had been. Even before the trip was over, I was ready to come home, to kiss my daughter, to sleep in my own bed.

But some things I'm not ready to release into the ether quite yet. I'm not ready for it to happen. Time won't wait, things change. People come and go. They move from reality, into a  vapor where you remember moments when you see a picture or pass a place. It hurts when it happens, it hurts more when you can see it coming. But there is a anxious pain when you have to do it by choice. People affect each other in different ways, and in ways that aren't easily visible.

Relationships that may seem insignificant may have a lasting impact, they become the coin in your pocket. To others, it's just a bit of leftover change, we accumulate so much of it during our lives. But to ourselves, it's so much more.

Jon, thanks for being a friend.